Judging and Tiny Cups

Stop judging, that you may not be judged. For as you judge, so will you be judged, and the measure with which you measure will be measured out to you.

 Sometimes, this verse is misunderstood to mean that we cannot judge actions as right or wrong, and so to mean we must tolerate serious wrongdoing because “it’s none of my business.” And if we judge others we will be severely judged. But elsewhere, Jesus tells us to “judge with right judgment” (John 7:24). So, we CAN judge, but we shouldn’t?

 Sometimes, this is (more correctly) understood to mean that we can judge actions but not people. We should not condone sin, but we cannot condemn a sinner. This is certainly true, but where is love in this interpretation? Refusal to judge must be filled with genuine love for the other, and a desire for their good. A “parable” from Erasmus Leiva-Merikakis in his wonderful reflection on the Gospel of Matthew entitled Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word (Ignatius Press) invites us to a subtler reflection on how we might apply these words to our lives:

 A beggar comes to my door asking for water to quench his thirst. I will not turn him away, because I fear some neighbor might observe my disdain. At the same time I do not consider the beggar worthy of touching with his lips more than the smallest tin cup in the house, which I quickly fill and brusquely hand him, so carelessly that half the cup spills. The cup is so small and mean, in fact, that I tell him to keep it. In reality, I don’t want to waste my time in such company.

 Much time—a whole lifetime—passes, and I find myself in the presence of Christ the King and Judge. I anxiously await my reward: I have always revered God, kept the commandments, observed the Lenten fasts, and celebrated the Church’s feasts with due solemnity. The King hands me back my tin cup, which I had long forgotten and certainly did not expect to see again in this eschatological setting. Seeing the look of dismay on my face, and with an infinite kindness in his voice that almost has the pleading tone of a beggar in it, Christ says to me: ‘I’m sorry, friend. Even I, the King, have no other cup to give you.’

Taking on ourselves the role of judge closes us up against all that the Lord wants to give us! It is not simply a fear of judgment that should align us with these words of Christ, but the awful truth that the capacity of our own hearts for love and forgiveness and God is constricted when we ignore them! To become “perfect as the heavenly Father is perfect,” we must share his loving and forgiving view of all of creation, particularly those we find difficult.

How can we see others through the lens of genuine love today?

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Kathryn Mulderink, MA, is married to Robert, Station Manager for Holy Family Radio. Together they have seven children (including newly ordained Father Rob and seminarian Luke ;-), and two grandchildren. She is a Secular Discalced Carmelite and has published five books and many articles. Over the last 25 years, she has worked as a teacher, headmistress, catechist, Pastoral Associate, and DRE. Currently, she serves the Church as a writer and voice talent for Catholic Radio, by publishing and speaking, and by collaborating with the diocesan Office of Catechesis, various parishes, and other ministries to lead others to encounter Christ and engage their faith. Her website is https://www.kathryntherese.com/.

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Be Not Afraid

“Do not be afraid! Life with Christ is a wonderful adventure. He alone can give full meaning to life, he alone is the center of history. Live by him!” – Pope St. John Paul II

I once tried counting how many times the Bible instructs us to not be afraid, but failed pretty quickly. In our world, there is often trouble, hopelessness, and despair. Today’s readings speak of the many storms in our lives. A storm can mean something we see right in front of us, such as the one the disciples saw when Jesus calmed it in the Gospels, or something psychological, such as the sufferings of Job.

In the book of Job, God is silent for the majority of the book and it is up to us to find His presence. We are weak in that we often don’t believe until we have the concrete evidence staring us in the face. We are ignorant to doubt God’s power. God’s ways are so insurmountable that human standards cannot begin to compare to them. 

We owe God unfailing trust. Christ repeatedly instructs us to have no fear. I think for my young children as well as for my much older self, the imagery of Christ calming the storm after peacefully lying asleep while his disciples fret is one of the most recognizable images of who God really is to us. Do we not have faith? If so, why worry? If we belong to Christ, we are no longer of this world, but have eternal life.

Just as it is said in today’s Psalm, Give thanks to the Lord, His love is everlasting. And as said by St. Paul, “Let us no longer live for ourselves, but for He who for our sake died and was raised. For in Him, we have eternal life.”

Therefore, let us again remember to “Be not afraid”.

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Dr. Alexis Dallara-Marsh is a board-certified neurologist who practices in Bergen County, NJ. She is a wife to her best friend, Akeem, and a mother of two little ones on Earth and two others in heaven above.

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Do not worry

Three simple words that begin a short list of things Jesus tells us to not worry about  – food, drink, clothes. I do not worry about those things, I have more important things to worry about – meaningful work, health, my aging parents, my children and grandchildren. Have you ever thought that as you read this passage? Your “to-worry about” list may look different than mine but there it is nonetheless.

How though, do we allow our faith and trust in God’s love and care for us to stand side by side with worry? I realize it’s not easy to not worry. In my family, worry is how love is expressed. I choose not to worry. It is very conscious on my part. I make this choice as I try to do this in my life, “But seek first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides” (Mt 6:33).  

I don’t always succeed in not worrying, but as I focus on what God has done and continues to do in my life, I realize none of it happened as a result of worry. Rather, it happened when there was trust and surrender on my part. I’ll give you an example: many years ago, my husband and I were buying a house. Everything was moving along and then he lost his job; no problem, I still had mine. And then, there went my job. By some miracle (GOD) it all moved forward and happened anyway. I have many stories of God’s intervention in my life. You do too! Today, spend time looking at your life and writing down all the times problems worked out without worry, how things worked out by the grace of God who will provide for you.

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Deanna G. Bartalini, is a Catholic writer, speaker, educator and retreat leader. She is the founder of the LiveNotLukewarm.com community, a place to inform, engage and inspire your Catholic faith through interactive Bible studies, courses and book clubs. Her weekly podcast, NotLukewarmPodcast.com, gives you tips and tools to live out your faith. At DeannaBartalini.com  she writes about whatever is on her mind at the moment.

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Storing the Right Treasures

As many blog posts and reflections begin, I have a confession to make. I probably have too much yarn. Now I know, the “probably” I put in should probably be removed, but I’m not ready to both admit I have too much yarn and do something about it. I am a fiber artist with no sales, no following, or customers. I just love to crochet, knit, weave, quilt, cross stitch, I even have a spinning wheel I’m rehabbing. I bounce from project to project, excited to try new techniques and styles. I watch YouTube for tutorials and ideas. Yarn, and all the things I can create with it, brings me much joy.

 There is a problem with this hobby of mine that I’ve noticed over the years. What I haven’t shared yet is that I am a wife and mother of 6 children ages 10 and under. My days are full. Full of homeschooling, laundry, cooking, baking, sunscreen, skinned knees, and picnics. My hobby time is in the evenings. Most of the time, this is fine. I am ok with cutting off housework that didn’t get done in order to have time for yarn and crafts as the sun goes down. But there are some days I find myself resentful of my little people, of their messes and constant hunger, of the churn of the laundry and crush of chores unfinished. I wish for days of silence with my yarn. I feel like projects which are supposed to bring me joy are wearing me down with the slowness of their progress. “Why can’t they just leave me alone?” “Why can’t I have some space to knit (or whatever I’m currently fascinated by).”

Each day that I allow myself to travel along this path the worse it gets. I am trying to store treasure in earthly things. In focusing on the crafting I am not doing, I am missing the opportunities God is giving me in the present moment. It’s like trying to capture air escaping from a balloon or gathering water in a sieve. The more apparent treasure I pile in the unhappier I become instead of the opposite. I am believing that my happiness lies in my ability to create things when I am surrounded with the greatest works of creation I could participate in, my children. The things I make can bring me happiness, but that happiness should be in service of my relationships with my kids and how I am living out my vocation.

 Jesus says, “For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be.” When I choose to be fully present to my family, even in its disorder and chaos, it is also full of love, beauty, joy, and God’s will for our family. These are the treasures that will last a lifetime – beyond a lifetime. Doing God’s will, loving those He has brought into our lives, these are just a taste of the treasures of heaven.

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Kate Taliaferro is an Air Force wife and mother. She is blessed to be able to homeschool, bake bread and fold endless piles of laundry. When not planning a school day, writing a blog post or cooking pasta, Kate can be found curled up with a book or working with some kind of fiber craft. Kate blogs at DailyGraces.net.

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Leading, and Living, by Example

As I was reflecting on today’s passage, I was reminded of my high school days in JROTC. While the program had its pros and cons, I learned some important lessons about leadership there. 

One lesson that the program emphasized was that good leaders do not ask the people they are in charge of to do things they themselves are unable or unwilling to do. Good leaders don’t tell those they lead to walk an extra mile while they themselves drive. Good leaders walk that mile, too.

This seems to be one of the messages of today’s readings as well. Paul reminds the people of Corinth that he is not a perfect man, and he is not asking them to do anything he is unable or unwilling to do. Jesus reminds us that we must be willing to forgive others if we are seeking forgiveness for ourselves after sinning against the Infinite Good Himself.

It makes sense that a good leader and a good Christian should have this trait in common. Both leaders and Christians are called to be shining examples, in word and deed, to those around them.

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J.M. Pallas has had a lifelong love of Scriptures. When she is not busy with her vocation as a wife and mother to her “1 Samuel 1” son, or her vocation as a public health educator, you may find her at her parish women’s bible study, affectionately known as “The Bible Chicks.”

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Keeping it Simple

I often try to imagine what life was like in the early Church, in the first century, a Church still struggling to understand what it was meant to be, to become. My field of studies is the medieval Church, though that’s not where I go in my imagination—with its schisms and crusades and infighting, it’s not always a pleasant place to be! But the beginning, when everything was fresh and new and immediate and simple… that’s a place I like to visit.

Simple. There’s a word that the Church seems to have subsequently forgotten, right? But imagine for a moment what it was like in those times after the Spirit descended at Pentecost and the disciples formed house churches, modeling as they did Jesus’ own strategy when he sent his followers out into the places people live.

Throughout the book of Acts, every mention of a local Church or Church meeting, whether for worship or fellowship, is a reference to a Church meeting in a home. That’s easy for us to forget, with our pews and our stained glass and our organs. Most scholars agree that the early house Churches were rarely comprised of more than 15 or 20 people. (As many as 90 percent of townspeople lived in apartments—one or two rooms above or behind shops. Most apartments shared a public courtyard with adjoining units, and families cooked in the courtyards. Life happened in front of the neighbors. In first-world countries, it’s hard to imagine what the early Church experienced.)

So it was simple. In these dining-area courtyards, Christians assembled: to reenact the Eucharist, to pray, to plan evangelization, to teach, to baptize.

What distinguished them from us, their descendants, so many centuries later is, I think, their closeness to Jesus. Not everyone in these first small communities had known Jesus when he was alive, but some had. Others had parents or cousins or friends who had. His words were still fresh in their minds; theology hadn’t stepped in to distance them from what he had to say to them, from what he gave his infant Church.

What he gave them is what we read in today’s Gospel from St. Matthew, the practices known as the “three pillars” of the Church: prayer, fasting, and charity. 

There’s a reason they’re known as pillars. According to the dictionary, a pillar is “a person or thing regarded as reliably providing essential support for something.” Essential support. What the structure needs to stay intact.

What does the Church need to stay intact?

Jesus doesn’t simply gift his people with three pillars that will keep them strong and on the right path. He tells them very specifically how those pillars are to be used. When you give alms, he says, don’t make a big deal of it. Help people quietly; they’ll know, and so will God. You don’t need a street named after you or a civic award presented at a formal ceremony. 

When you pray, he continues, don’t make a big deal of it. Be quiet; be private. Don’t try to attract attention to your prayers; they’re not performance art.

And when you fast, he concludes, don’t make a big deal of it. Don’t call attention to yourself, don’t try to be holier-than-thou. God knows when you fast; and that’s pretty much the whole point of doing it, right?

You’ll notice that he isn’t saying “if you pray… if you give alms… if you fast.” These pillars of faith he’s gifting to the early Church are in fact a blueprint for how they are to live together in community. He is assuming that this is what his followers will do. He’s not concerned in telling them to pray, fast, and give alms: of course they’ll do those things! What he wants is for his followers, his new Church, to be very clear about its relationship to God and its relationship to the world. You do these things for closeness to the Trinity, not for societal approbation and rewards.

The Gospels have always struck me as keeping things pretty simple. Love God, and love your neighbor as yourself. Clothe the naked; feed the hungry; give to the poor. Pray always. Fast and give alms.

We live in a different world, of course. In a world where we don’t worship in each other’s homes. In a world of such staggering inequality that it’s difficult to see how almsgiving could change anything. In a world where our prayers often go unanswered. In a world where the Church’s requirements for fasting are hardly an inconvenience. We might yearn for a simpler time.

Yet we could keep it simple, if we tried. If we read Jesus’ words and applied them rigorously to our own lives and comportment and thought and faith. It wouldn’t be easy, but it could be…. Simple.

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Jeannette de Beauvoir is a writer and editor with the digital department of Pauline Books & Media, working on projects as disparate as newsletters, book clubs, ebooks, and retreats that support the apostolate of the Daughters of St. Paul at http://www.pauline.org.

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Praise Amid the Storm

I read a really good reflection the other day by Dr. MaryRuth Hackett, who writes for Blessed Is She. It spoke about the suffering of another woman who was questioning why God would allow her to go through what she was going through, and how the response of a friend helped her change her perspective. Her friend reminded her that perhaps her own sufferings were in preparation for something yet to come, or simply to help her be there for others.

Dr. Hackett writes: “It is very difficult to have empathy if we lack experience. Even if we love someone deeply, it is impossible to walk the path of grief for example, if we have never experienced grief. We can sympathize, but we cannot empathize. We can witness and listen, but we lack a level of understanding.”

This was truly helpful to me considering all we continue to go through with my son’s health. It is so easy to question why a small six-year-old boy must endure this. It is so easy to get angry and become anxious.

Yet, what if these trials will later allow me to be there for someone else who is suffering? What if the suffering will make my son stronger or get him thinking about ministering to the sick as a doctor or a priest?

We do not know the big picture. We do not know the reasons. We can only trust, holding on to God for dear life during our wild ride on this planet.

I pray that somehow I may find the strength that the people of Macedonia had in today’s First Reading, who “in a severe test of affliction, the abundance of their joy and their profound poverty overflowed in a wealth of generosity on their part.” In the midst of their suffering, they found a way to be generous to others. I have no doubt they also praised God, just as Job had done during his time of great trial.

So, instead of getting stuck in a rut of anguish, I feel called to view this trial with a wider perspective. Just yesterday as I was talking with my husband he mentioned that my eight-year-old was now playing much more with his younger siblings, whom he didn’t interact with much before. I also thought that since my ill son is very sensitive, this ordeal might grant him more strength of character to endure life’s blows.

The end of the First Reading also grants comfort: “For you know the gracious act of our Lord Jesus Christ, that for your sake he became poor although he was rich, so that by his poverty you might become rich.”

I have yet to comprehend what fruits or “riches” this trial may bring, but in the meantime, may God grant me the grace to exclaim with the Psalmist: “Praise the Lord, my soul!”

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Tami Urcia grew up in Western Michigan, a middle child in a large Catholic family. She spent early young adulthood as a missionary in Mexico, studying theology and philosophy, then worked and traveled extensively before finishing her Bachelor’s Degree in Western Kentucky. She loves tackling home improvement projects, finding fun ways to keep her four boys occupied, quiet conversation with the hubby and finding unique ways to love. She works at her parish, is a guest blogger on CatholicMom.com and BlessedIsShe.net, runs her own blog at https://togetherandalways.wordpress.com and has been doing Spanish translations on the side for almost 20 years.

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Response Required

I remember studying today’s Gospel passage all the way back in high school – my sophomore year spring semester New Testament class, to be exact. 

We obviously spent a lot of time studying the Sermon on the Mount – Jesus’ pinnacle teaching in the Gospel according to Matthew, in which He taught the disciples (and, by extension, us) on a number of different things. 

While I don’t remember every single word that poured forth from my teacher’s mouth that semester, I do remember spending a lot of time on today’s Gospel – the Teaching About Retaliation. 

Any modern-day interpretation of this passage is just downright strange and a little otherworldly. If you get slapped across the cheek, offer the other side as well? No thanks, hard pass. Why would anyone willingly offer to get slapped once, let alone twice? The other examples that Jesus offers, like someone suing for a cloak and then also handing over a tunic, just make things even weirder. 

The teachings were pretty countercultural at the time, too. Remember, the Jewish people followed the law given to them by Moses. Their law said, “‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth,’” meaning that if someone plucked out your eye, you got to pluck out their eye as punishment in return. 

If you read the footnote for this passage, it says, “The Old Testament commandment was meant to moderate vengeance; the punishment should not exceed the injury done. Jesus forbids even this proportionate retaliation.” 

Let’s pause and take that last statement in. Jesus doesn’t want “even this proportionate retaliation” and He certainly doesn’t want retaliation that goes above and beyond the initial hurt or injury. That must mean He doesn’t want us to retaliate AT ALL. Hence offering the other cheek or the tunic as well, the exact opposite of retaliation. 

What I think this passage offers to us today is the opportunity to reflect on how we respond when we are hurt by another person, no matter what kind of hurt it is. While we may not yet be up to the level of offering our other cheek, are we at least “slow to anger and abounding in mercy” (Psalm 145:8), remembering that our heavenly Father does the same for us when we hurt Him as the result of our sin? Or do we answer with a sharp tongue and lash out with our hurt feelings? 

After a moment of reflection, do not be afraid to ask the Lord to work within you, to invite Him into those moments of hurt and to guide your response in those moments. 

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Erin Madden is a Cleveland native and graduate of Franciscan University of Steubenville. She is passionate about the Lord Jesus, all things college sports and telling stories and she is blessed enough to get paid for all three of her passions. You can catch her on old episodes of the Clarence & Peter Podcast on YouTube as well as follow her on Twitter@erinmadden2016.

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Seeds for the Kingdom

“If anyone comes to me, I want to lead them to Him.” (St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross)

In today’s Gospel, we hear Jesus tell the disciples that the Kingdom of God can be compared to a mustard seed. When we hear the words “Kingdom of God”, it’s easy for us to think of Heaven and forget that those of us here on earth are part of the Kingdom of God. In this parable, Jesus includes us in the Kingdom of God and tells us how the Kingdom of God is meant to be home for everyone. 

For the past two years I have worked in a secular environment. It’s the first time I’ve really worked outside the “Catholic bubble” in my life. I love my job, but because I’m not constantly steeped in a Catholic environment, I often feel like the Church is getting smaller rather than growing. I’ve struggled with how to bring others into the Catholic Church, especially when so much about the Church is misunderstood and many people have negative feelings toward the Church. In this parable about the mustard seed and the Kingdom of Heaven, Jesus says “..once it is sown, it springs up and becomes the largest of plants and puts forth large branches, so that the birds of the sky can dwell in its shade”. I think I would have struggled less if I realized that I do not have the power to make the branches longer in order to shade more people. What I can do is either bring others to the shade that is already there or plant more mustard seeds. That is, I can either bring people to the Kingdom of God or I can plant the seed of faith that will eventually grow to, hopefully, include many more people in the Kingdom. Sowing Truth will yield a great harvest for the Kingdom of God.

As we go about this week, may we pray about the ways that we can bring others to the Kingdom of God and may we strive to be seeds that reap a bountiful harvest.

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Dakota currently lives in Denver, CO and teaches English Language Development and Spanish to high schoolers. She is married to the love of her life, Ralph. In her spare time, she reads, goes to breweries, and watches baseball. Dakota’s favorite saints are St. John Paul II (how could it not be?) and St. José Luis Sánchez del Río. She is passionate about her faith and considers herself blessed at any opportunity to share that faith with others. Check out more of her writing at https://dakotaleonard16.blogspot.com.

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Be Childlike

Today, on the memorial of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, we get a glimpse of what it must have been like raising Jesus. Kind of nerve-wracking, if you ask me. Jesus, my son, the Son of God, lost for three whole days??? I can’t even imagine! Still, in this Gospel, we are humbled by the voice of a child, so calmly knowing that he is his Father’s child. 

Last weekend, I met someone that was sharing her humbling experience of raising faith-filled children. She shared with me that the other day her daughter started a sentence with, “Mommy, I had a vision while adoring Jesus and I was wondering…” and it was at that point that she knew she was out of her depth. She knew that she would be relying on her Father, Our Father, to raise this little, prayerful child. If anything, she strived to have the child-like faith and relationship with the Lord that her daughter had!

This little one, as well as young Jesus, are such wonderful examples of how we should be young in spirit when it comes to our relationship with the world. In Matthew 18:3, Jesus says, “Amen, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.” 

How do we do this? How can we be like holy little children? How do we come to be so comfortable in our Father’s house that we lose ourselves?

I believe the biggest components of this are the following two things:

  1. Share your life with the Lord! 

Whether you’re celebrating, worried, or needing guidance, just spend some time in community with God. You don’t have to start with three hours in adoration or a special chair for prayer, it can be small. It can be while you’re driving to the grocery store, as you wash the dishes, or even when you’re taking a shower! The main thing is to just begin that open communication of sharing your life, all the joy and heartaches, with God.

  1. Have the strength to rely on God, your father. 

So many times, we push ourselves to the limit trying to be the best, to do the best, and are then let down when our best doesn’t feel good enough. But, like children, we must remember that we are not alone and we are put in community because we are meant to ask for help. Children will raise their arms to the sky as a signal to pick them up or that they need help, and we can do the same. In fact, even in 2 Corinthians 12:9, we are given the words, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” This means that the power of God does not rely on our power, because truly we have none. We are weak and that is OKAY because it is through HIS grace, HIS love, HIS power that we are able to do such glorious things and experience true joy. 

So take some time to share your life with God. Tell Him about your work week while you fold laundry. Surrender your exhaustion to the Lord. Ask Him to strengthen and guide you. 

Start the conversation. Accept God’s strength. Be childlike. 

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Veronica Alvarado is a born and raised Texan currently living in Pennsylvania. Since graduating from Texas A&M University, Veronica has published various Catholic articles in bulletins, newspapers, e-newsletters, and blogs. She continued sharing her faith after graduation as a web content strategist and digital project manager. Today, she continues this mission in her current role as communications director and project manager for Pentecost Today USA, a Catholic Charismatic Renewal organization in Pittsburgh. 

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